Seashell Secrets VIII

Would he understand? Gar had been Lon’s friend since they were old enough to speak. Their moms had been in the same clubs in High School. Old time Miamians, the two women had seen the lunar landings on television, had both worked at Burdines and had once dated the same guy at the same time. When they had found out, they had played a trick on him convincing him that they were sisters that had killed their last boyfriend. Oh, how they had laughed!

When Gar’s Mom had discovered that Lon’s Mom was pregnant, she had convinced Gar’s Dad that it was the time to have a child, too. As a result, the two boys were born within a year of each other. They had grown up sharing each other’s houses, each set of parents would babysit for the other. They were like brothers. Lon wondered what would happen when he told him that he was gay.

He had to tell him. Gar would probably freak. It was okay for other people, but they were so close. Gar had to understand that Lon did not see him in a sexual way, but that he had felt like a pretender with every girl that he had dated. The girls would like him and then… Well, it was unpleasant.

For now it was just a realization. He was just aware of his feelings for men. There were men that he found attractive in a way that he never found women. He had asked this guy Herb to go to the pool hall with him. They had a couple of sodas and there had been some heavy petting in the car. He had felt great, as if he had discovered himself. He had discovered the part of him that had been missing from himself.

How would Gar react? How would the band react? Telling his parents was even scarier. They were so conservative that they had a framed picture of Ronald Reagan next to Jesus Christ in the dining room. He didn’t really mind because he liked Nancy Reagan and Jesus was a friend, but how would they react to this side of him? It was all of him after all; this was his identity.

He lay in bed and wondered what to do. Gar was listening to the band’s practice recordings. He listened and paid close attention. They sounded good. He smiled and put down the recorder. He went to the fridge to get a glass of water. Lully was practicing again. He had heard her play once at his house. She had tried to play some music for him. It was a disaster. She had never tried again and that’s when she started thinking about becoming a bartender. It was ridiculous.

He had gone over to her house to pick her up one day and she had been practicing. She was incredible; her fingers flew. Then, he had bought her a great book of sheet music, but she had not been able to play it well. He had still been amazed because he couldn’t read music at all. He had been about to tell her that, but she had said that she was horrible, thanked him for the book and left. Really, a disaster. Part of the reason why he had dated her was her musical ability and ear. He felt horrible about the stupid book and the whole event.

Now that she was playing again, he was tempted to ask her to play with the band, but she would have to get some gear. How would he ask Lon and Paul? They both thought of her as this poor alky who couldn’t be trusted. He shook his head and sighed. It was three in the morning. He wanted to call Lully, but what would he say?

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